Dork

Ok, I think about using this space much more than I actually use it. I make mental blog posts that never materialize. The reasons are many: big brother watching, so many words already in the blogosphere, etc. So I guess I have come to the conclusion that I am doing it for me and not you. I hope that you do not mind. 

I have been thinking about pessimism, optimism, and the persistance of memory. I am currently making some big decisions about what to do with my life post-graduation. Should I get a job and begin paying down some school loans? Should I travel with my family and create some memories that will stay with us forever, despite the immediate economic impact it will have on our lives? 

I honestly do not know. We will see. We will keep talking about it until we know. 

My husband makes fun of me for wanting to discuss things again and again. My point of view subtly changes all of the time, so I feel like it needs to be re-discussed. He doesn't. On the surface I am the optimist in the relationship. I try to see the best in and think the best of people. I think the stories we tell really effect our realities. He has been known to grumble about people in general. He works more closely with people, so this is to be expected. 

Yet, when it comes time to do something, I am the waverer. I am unsure about what to do and how it will be received. He is the one who has the confidence to throw things out there and trust that they will be well received. One of us is an optimistic pessimist. The other is a pessimistic optimist. I am not sure who is which.

It has been a long time since I have been to this site, although I have continued to post in my mind.

So much has been going on with the kiddos and with all of the sad news recently.

some time away

Hello there. It has been a bit since I checked in and it may be a while before I am back again. We are expecting the arrival of our daughter this week. Monumental statement so casually worded. Yet I am imploding with excitement, nervousness, and anticipation.

In the meantime I have been baking cookies and doing dishes and laundry per our usual routine. Our little man has no idea how his world is about to be upended. Luckily family is coming to town to spoil him for the transitional period. And hopefully he will come to adore his little sis as I am sure that we all will. It is strange to think about how her presence will one day be a given while it is so new and foreign a thought right now.

In any case that is where I will be for the next little bit.

Debut

Hello world.

I have been considering venturing into the blogosphere for a while now. I am not sure what pushed me over the edge, perhaps learning more about social media. It is funny because I am a bit of a Luddite and certainly an intentional late-adopter when it comes to technological advances. But I have lots of thoughts in my head and not many folks to share them with since moving to The Copper State. So now I can throw them out into the ether and see what happens.

I spent the day in the sunshine, tabling at an Earth Day Event. I am so white. My skin pinkens with the smallest dose of rays. It felt good to be out, though. The winter in Flagstaff is long and cold. Spring is a long time in coming here. Gardening can be a real challenge. We are going to give it our best shot and see what happens. I love playing in the dirt even if our bed does not yield any food.

Tomorrow I am off on a field trip to go spend some time with some bees. I love bees. They fascinate me and I want to know more about them. Fostering healthy bees seems like doing a good deed for the universe. I want to learn more about this. Although I am a honey lover (the darker the better) it is not my primary motivation. Anyone who spends time with plants knows how important pollinators are. And even beyond that, bees seem to have some kind of cosmic connection. It seems that one could never know all there is to know about bees. Hopefully I will be a little more enlightened tomorrow.

And so it begins.